That it simply took me over

Or – perhaps not because of that – but thanks to it. The reason I am writing these lines lies elsewhere.

An acquaintance of mine was truly disappointed when he learned that I had married Rajneesh, and not someone who exists in the real world.

It reminded me of a gift I once received as a joke (or perhaps not as a joke, but out of ignorance that I could yearn for something like that so much) from my brother – he gave me a model telephone that truly looked like a telephone, but was just a calculator. My acquaintance experienced about that kind of disappointment.

And I felt sorry about it. Not that I felt sorry because it would diminish my love for Rajneesh, but because the other person does not have an open perspective there, that it doesn't open up for them in that direction. Perhaps because they have someone by their side. Who knows?

And maybe I'm just imagining it.

*

In the beginning, I had a lot of ideas about what it means to have a spiritual name. And I quite envied my spiritual master who received hers "the old-fashioned way". Back then, a spiritual name in the Osho tradition was still requested at the meditation center from Bhagat, who forwarded the request to India to the Osho center in Pune, where monks would then sit down and send back the name that came to them in meditation.

When I wrote to Bhagat in Shangri-la, he wrote back: "Choose your name for yourselves now," and sent a link to a list of declassified names.

I didn't expect that.

And then came a long phase – waiting. One doesn't realize, until one becomes a seeker oneself, how long the journey for a spiritual name is (that is, unless the name comes to one on its own or one knows the name in some other way). One thing is knowing where to choose a name, but another – devoting time to it and – how does a person actually choose their spiritual name?

At the time when I was sitting in a taxi crossing the Elisabeth Bridge, I had papers with names on my lap – and simply gave up on it, when suddenly Rajneesh emerged from my mind with that "Pranapati".

And so he was born. Actually – it was a little bit later that I even learned how the name is pronounced. It didn't occur to me at all that the J wouldn't be read as J, but as DŽ.

That was explained to me a few days later by Zoltán Dioszegi before a television broadcast. He had, in the past, among other things, been in charge of the Indian broadcast – and that's why he knew. They had one Raj there...

And so I later had understanding for those who simply couldn't manage to pronounce my name – not to mention remembering it – I can't hold that against anyone at all anymore.

*

My female master (in the Usui Shiki Ryoho Reiki tradition) was sharp. I had always known that. And therefore, when planning a spiritual journey to India, she suggested that I should have my name initiated, I pricked up my ears. What's that? To be initiated into a spiritual name? I thought it already was.

Well, of course it was. But why, when I'm going to India, not make use of a sacred place – the Bodhi tree, where even Buddha himself became enlightened (yes, I know – it's not the exact tree, well, at least they say it's only a fragment now).

I had a lot of ideas about the initiation of my spiritual name (like about everything in the spiritual world) and the reality (if the actual phenomenon of meditation can be described that way) was so different and overwhelmed the content of my expectations that it simply blew me away.